The Positive Effects of Failure

If you’re part of my email list then you may have seen my rant that went out last night, if not you should totally join. I’ll give you the rundown anyway.

Basically I was saying how annoyed I get when bloggers are all, “in 2019 I’m going to resolve to LOVE myself, every flaw, and you should too!” or the “wow this year has been wild if you told me that I’d be who I am today one year ago I wouldn’t believe you and blah, blah, blah, snooooze”.

Is it just me or does anyone else feel like this is all just oozing bullshit everywhere!?
Like everyone’s just saying it because it’s the trendy thing to do.

You’re all telling the same story.

I have a story for ya, I suck at life pretty much 75% of the time. I complain more than I want to admit, my 9-5 is far from perfect, my bedroom often looks like a tornado ripped through, I have a water bottle graveyard in my car, I am the clumsiest person you’ll ever meet and even more so when I’ve had too much wine. (Que video of me falling on my face last month because my shoelaces became entangled).

It’s all good, I accept these things about myself and I wish I had that video of me falling because it was funny as hell. I thought my guts were going to fall out of my body I laughed so hard.

I guess my problem with new years resolution makers is that I don’t believe you. I don’t believe that in one year you gained all the confidence you ever needed. I don’t believe in one year you can “self-love” and learn how to be so perfectly flawless, sorry, but stuff like that takes a lifetime to learn.

I’m not saying you can’t improve these things and work towards them just…

Stop making it look so easy! Because I know first-hand change is not easy.

Some of us out here are falling on our face, failing, getting back up, trying again and working every day just to make small changes.  

Do we have to show everybody every which way we are succeeding but hide the failure, or can we be human for a second and let people see we aren’t perfect?

Maybe I’m over exaggerating, but I think it’s important to fail! To do the things that are difficult and challenging in order to learn and grow.

So here are 7 ways I failed in 2018 (sorry the Instagram version is funnier but you can see that here)


Always finding the motivation

“Wait, your not motivated every second of every day? Don’t you like blog about motivational things??” No one said this to me I’m just imagining it. However, I had some serious lack of motivation days where things didn’t get accomplished and I felt like a loser. Hey, it happens. I’ll try to be better this year by planning ahead more.

Lesson learned: It is just a matter of creating routines, getting over the fear of being bad at something, and remembering that you’re awesome.


Will I ever learn is the real question? Organization can be a hard fail for me and this year I had a couple cringe-worthy examples of that. Like being unorganized enough to leave my wallet at home when I went on vacation…nice.

Lesson learned: always check to see if you have your wallet

Hitting my goals

The real issue is actually that I set goals that are astronomical and very hard to achieve. Especially in the time frame I give myself. I do it because I would rather push myself to do more than sell myself short but the flipside is that it then I feel like I failed when I don’t hit my ridiculous goals.

Lesson learned: set reasonable goals


Running out of creativity sucks because you want to bang your head against the computer until something comes out. It’s like the worst math test you ever took where you didn’t know a single answer. For most people, it probably doesn’t sound like a big deal to run out of creativity but, for me, it is an ongoing struggle and makes me feel like I’m not good enough to even pretend to call myself a blogger

Lesson learned: don’t bang your head against the computer it only breaks the computer

Unfinished work

I sent out an email that I knew wasn’t good. It was half-assed and was missing a video link. It was another one of those situations where I set a deadline for myself, but this time instead of missing it I just sent it out half-finished and sloppy. Not my best move.

Lesson learned: better time management, more planning, giving myself more time to get things done

Being hard on myself

I am my toughest critic. I worry about the content I put out and how people will react to it. I worry what my friends will think of it. I criticize myself before someone else can and I always feel a little bit of skepticism about my work

The worst part is sometimes I try to hide my failure rather than face it head on and deal with it

Lesson learned: this is my first step in the new year to being braver and learning to live and grow from failure.

Remember that article 15 Things you can learn from making mistakes, I wrote way back in September. If not it’s fine you can find it here. Mistakes are important they are only important though if you can actually learn from them.

I do this really bizzare thing where every week one write down one thing I did awesome at and one thing I failed/ could have done better at. I know that sounds crazy but it makes it easily accessible to remind myself where I’m failing off and the small things that I can improve.

Share with me, what do you fail at that you’re learning from?

Don't be selfish, share this with your friends:

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